The Empowered Widow - Stories of Hope, Strength, Resilience, and Grace"
By Dr Jeanette Pinto
BETTER YOURSELF BOOKS, 58/23rd Road, TPS III, Bandra West, Mumbai 400 050, India
ISBN 978-81-7108-954-3 – Year 2025 / Pp 143 / Rs 200/-
The word most repulsive to the ears of a woman who has lost her husband is 'widow'. With a combination of sadness, denial, anger, resentment, yearning and suffering confusing her mind, the word makes her feel branded, or even scalded, and she abhors it. Hearteningly, however, the eventual acceptance of her situation leads her from victimhood to victory in her 'grief journey'. That is what this new book by an eminent educator, counsellor and life trainer is all about!
THE EMPOWERED WIDOW is a treasure trove of Hope, Strength, Resilience and Grace. Expressing a widow's deep pain of spousal loss and the struggles that challenge her journey to a meaningful life of self-empowerment and peace, the contents can help the reader learn humanising life lessons. Divided into four sections, this book can help any reader transcend any misconception concerning widowhood, and thus give every widow her due. Section One dwells on the 'faith' factor related to widowhood that leads a widow to the wonder of responding to her situation vis-à-vis a call to a new way of life, buoyed of course by reminiscences of the life just gone by. If a peep into the story of Corrine (p. 25), the late mother of the new Archbishop of Bombay, His Grace, the kindly John Rodrigues, doesn't convince in this regard, nothing will!
The stories in Section Two, each stemming from a particular slice of a widow's life, challenge the widow to reorient her personal suffering to a wider cause that cannot but take her beyond grief (p. 56). Section Three (p. 77) brings into play the valuable support of those who matter in the life of a widow, viz. friends and family. Section Four would help a widow encounter the prospects of a new kind of fulfilment in a life rooted in the reality of miracles that hope makes possible. How? By using to the hilt her latent capabilities she has hitherto not had the opportunity to explore (p. 109)! Lastly, Section Five brings the reader the experiences of widows who, having faced stoically the challenges of their individual situations, have found hope that has led them from fear to joy. Delightfully, all of this accords due legitimacy to the very purpose of the Hope & Life Movement, initiated 40 Ruby-red years ago by the great visionary and octogenarian, Bishop Bosco Penha!
Interestingly, the genial Jeanette brings to bear on the text her convictions concerning widowhood. A widow herself, she is a writer with a dual mission, viz. to enhance the lives of other widows and to give all concerned a clearer perception of the widow's state of life. As Professor Nandini Sardesai, former HOD of Sociology at Saint Xavier's College, Mumbai, says in her Foreword: "Dr Jeanette Pinto has been wearing several 'bonnets' during her illustrious career" (p. 9): History scholar of repute; HOD - History and Vice Principal at Saint Xavier's College, Mumbai; Principal of Sophia College, Mumbai; Director, Human Life Committee, Archdiocese of Bombay, and a lot else! Her intense research, backed by extensive travel, spans a vast tapestry of topics. But her real accomplishment obviously lies in her personal essaying of the life of a widow. In fact, while her first book focused on widows as victims, her latest, THE EMPOWERED WIDOW – Stories of Hope, Strength, Resilience and Grace lucidly highlights the transformation possible by empowerment. Indeed, each story herein indicates how, with timely support, each widow can not only make a difference to her own life, but also help motivate and inspire others of her ilk.
THE EMPOWERED WIDOW – Stories of Hope, Strength, Resilience and Grace insists that "it is important to ignore people who tell you what to do and what not to do, and how you are to grieve 'properly' and stuff like that. The sentiments concerning loss of spouse are purely between you and your spouse. There is certainly no right and wrong way to grieve; it is very personal. Everyone grieves differently. Healing may take long in some cases, and that is alright. Some folks may say that you are stuck in yourself; move on. That is easier said than done, but perhaps they have your well-being in mind" (p 20). Transcending history, the book touches on the social norms, customs, and rituals of some major religions in India, thus affording the reader a fuller appreciation of a widow's life; further, it serves as an eye-opener to how legislation, reforms, and education can steer the Indian widow to be a beacon of light on the road to newfound happiness and hope. Simply put, this book will both appeal to the scholarly and influence the ordinary individual to chart a future of joy and fulfilment.
In conclusion, here's wishing you dear reader, with Vincent Moore,
"… a joyful journey on the train of life.
Reap success and give lots of love.
More importantly, thank God for the journey.
Lastly, I thank you for being one of the passengers on my train." (pp 136-137)
LADISLAUS LOUIS D'SOUZA